Most of us want results ASAP
Whenever we're hurting, struggling, or simply tired of repeating the same patterns, we want change immediately. We want the better relationship. The healthier body. The calmer mind. The more meaningful work.
As soon as possible.
There's nothing wrong with wanting relief. The problem is that our urgency often tricks us into believing that lasting change should happen quickly and we can get discouraged by the timeline for change.
Meaningful change almost always grows through small, repeatable actions rather than dramatic breakthroughs.
Over the years I've distilled that into four principles.
Coincidentally—or perhaps not—they spell ASAP.
A is for Affordable
I believe thoughtful guidance should be accessible. Not cheap mind you…just not at the level of organ donation to get good help.
So while not undervalued, reasonably within reach. I've been in the position of coaching executives making seven figures and I've coached hourly employees working two jobs just to make ends meet at $20/hour.
What has always surprised me is how similar their struggles often are. Different incomes but very similar fears. Very similar relationship patterns. Very similar questions.
Wisdom shouldn't become available only after financial success.
S is for Simple
Human beings consistently overestimate what they'll maintain as a practice, especially in the short-term when they're emotionally motivated. A couple has a breakthrough conversation. Someone leaves inspired after a seminar. A person decides this time will be different.
Then Tuesday arrives (after Monday usually). They're a bit more tired. Life settles into its busyness. Stressors become more pronounced and the ambitious plan quietly collapses.
The best strategies aren't impressive. They're repeatable.
Simple isn't simplistic. Simple survives real life.
A is for Accountable
Most people don't need someone to pressure them. I don’t do blame, shame, or guilt. Generally it’s unproductive. What people need is someone paying attention — someone who notices when old patterns quietly return. Then someone who reminds them of the person they're trying to become and a kind and firm way.
Never through shame. Through consistency.
Accountability isn't about being controlled.
It's about not having to change alone.
P is for Personalized
No system understands you. Systems can help, but people meet people at the center of problem solving. Frameworks do matter. So does science. And structure also matters.
But none of them replace thoughtful attention to another human being.
Every person brings different experiences. Different fears. Different strengths. And different stories.
The work should reflect that. Otherwise you're simply fitting people into a model instead of helping them understand themselves.
Rethinking ASAP
Most people interpret ASAP as:
As Soon As Possible.
I've come to think of it differently.
Affordable.
Simple.
Accountable.
Personalized.
Ironically, those four qualities usually produce something much more valuable than fast change. They produce lasting change. Because the goal isn't simply to solve today's problem.
It's to become the kind of person who navigates tomorrow's challenges with greater wisdom, confidence, and self-leadership.